Getting close to your friend.

It has been a many amount of months since I have contributed to the blog world. I must admit that when I am going through a rough time it is hard to be motivated to put my trash out there and let people learn from it. I am hoping that after so many situations like this I will learn what causes the trash and avoid it before it consumes months of my life. Anyway, God is so good and every time I sit down and consider the greatness of God I am amazed again that he loves me so intimately and even that he would allow Jesus to die for someone as unworthy as me.

I went to a conference and the speaker was talking about how as a parent you knew before you had kids that they would hurt you. You knew and chose to have them anyway. That is what God did with us as well. He knew we would be fickle hearted and we would turn from him time and time again. I consider the turning from him as small as nurturing a prideful attitude. It does not have to be having an affair on a spouse. You see sin is the same; there is only one word for it. We cannot categorize un-forgiveness as any less detrimental than a lie. In fact the physical ramifications of both will be enough to look into a more inclusive health plan.

The speaker was asking us if we felt we were growing spiritually. The audience of coarse all good Christians shouted, “Yes.” “How can you tell?” was the next question and the crowd was silent. He explained that we tend to measure by two things that produce depression and deception.

ONE: Absence of sin.
I have stopped sinning in an area. I have given up an addiction or some such sin. This doesn’t work because as humans we will probably replace it with another addiction or with the sin of pride and be haughty to the people who are still in that sin.

TWO: Consistency of Religious activity
I am involved in more religious activities. This doesn’t work because you can read your bible for an hour a day or be in church every night and never hear from God or get to know him anymore. Use the Pharisees as an example. They knew the scripture inside and out and spent much time at the temple but they did not know God. They had not heard from or had a personal relationship with God. They didn’t even recognize his son when he came to visit in the flesh.

The two ways that you can tell you are growing spiritually is this:

ONE: You have an increased awareness of how far from God you actually are.

TWO: You have an increased awareness of how much God loves you.

This was so significant to me. We do not have to strive to get to the next meeting. We do not have to DO anything. Well, have a relationship with the God of the universe.

Our value to God is NOT based on our performance!!

You see we can do NOTHING to get God to love us anymore.
AND
We can do NOTHING to get God to love us any less.

We totally have the ability to make God sad. Just like our parents. We can make them mad. But with God His love is constant more than the rising of the sun.

One last thing that the speaker said that I thought was great to put into words is that a true friendship is based on joy not benefits. You are friends with a person because of how you feel when you are with them not because of what they add to your life or what they can do for you.
This seems like a no brainer but I have stayed in a relationship that made me feel like crap for about the last two months because I was worried about how he would feel and it opened me up to a lot of discouragement, totally not worth it.

We need to make sure that we are living our destiny. What is it that is God’s absolute best for us and choose that. Why do we spend so much time on things that we think will make us happy?? God has been around for a little more time, he would know. And for those of us in our thirties and forties we have been around long enough to know that our way is not workin. We don’t choose the joy route. We choose the happy route, which is only as good as the circumstances around us (what happens) and we cannot control those. So the outcome is always temporal. We listen to all the shouting voices of our society and miss the voice with the most power to change our lives.

What message from the voices is having the most effect on your heart today? Are you feeling pressure to own a house? Or you should have a better paying job? Are you believing that you shouldn’t feel guilty over the porn because everyone does it? Is it that you should be married? Should you have kids by now? Is your car a piece of crap? How about that you should be out having fun with the opposite sex till 2 a.m. every weekend? You ARE single, right??

LIVIN LA VIDA LOCA!!

Is that true happiness? Where does my mark on eternity come into the equation? How do I point people to Jesus, He is the answer to every question of value, security, relationships, jobs, finances, etc? I encourage you today to take time to spend with your friend, as a friend, Jesus. Silent time, to allow him to speak truth to you about your worth and the things that are truly important in your life. His plan is so much better than ours; I think we all agree on that one.

Later,
Kari

What is God doing?

Well it turns out He is doing TONS and loads of people have figured that out already. I am excited to be learning about a myriad of new things happening in my city that I had no idea about. I will be getting involved soon. Starting with a prayer time at an outreach center in the inner city.

You see I have been sitting around waiting for God to direct me to what He wanted me to do when all the while maybe He was waiting for me to get my big butt off the couch. I am not saying that everything I get involved in will be a perfect fit because we are all so different but it is a start to see where He is already at work. I do not have to re-invent the wheel. I can join the already rolling work. So here is my question to you . . . What is God doing with you or around you?? How are you seeing God work in your section of the world? Please share to encourage those reading. I will update as soon as I find out what it’s all about. I am excited about a little anniversary event at The City Life Center to reflect on the 35th year of Roe vs. Wade. We will be prayer walking the neighborhood and just praising God for life. Join if it is on your heart to just tell God how grateful you are that you are alive and that your siblings were not subject to convenience. Praise God, He is at work! Our God is ALIVE and still active.

Making God, LORD

So I have had some crazy cool things happen to me over the last few months. I have tried to write to you guys but it has been hard since God has been doing some deep cleansing in my life. He is so gentle and kind in the middle of all the cutting away. It is amazing how he can be so thorough and so amiable at the same time.
I want to be as candid as possible since I know that many of you have been through the same thing but also I feel like it is important to make sure I do not give Satan a foothold so bear with me as I try to tell you all Christ has done.
My last dating relationship was three years ago and although I have maintained a standard of sexuality high above what is currently the cultural norm but my standard has not been biblical. In that relationship I chose to go beyond Gods guidelines for sex. I knew it was wrong before it happened and still I allowed the sin to take place. I dealt with the relationship and ended it after four months. In dealing with the relationship I got bitter. I tried to forgive the guy, since it was all his fault. Well, it was easier for me to deal with when I told myself that, after all he was supposed to be the “head” of the relationship. He moved on, getting married about 8 months after all this happened. I, on the other hand, decided to deal with it on my own and try to do all the forgiving and ignoring on my own. God had a different plan. You see his will for us is to become one flesh with only one person in our lifetimes. Even though I did not know it at the time this was part of the barrier in the relationship I had with my Dad as well.
The subject came up recently of my last relationship and I answered confidently and accurately, vaguely alluding to the facts. The fellow converser asked me what my parents said. And with all self righteousness I told them that they didn’t know. I had kept it all to myself. As soon as I said it I knew that I had to submit to my spiritual authority and let them know, additionally I needed to repent before them for all the pain I had caused my family. Some background: the guy with whom I had this relationship was close with my family and was still involved with family things. By not telling the family what had happened it looked like I was an immature, jealous, hateful person that just wanted to make times together miserable. Which I did quite effectively. So we were all involved in some way or another.
Well, had a talk with my parents who were so great and gracious to me. I was TOTALLY amazed at the difference the confession had on me. I could literally feel the freedom of the situation. I have never before known a forgiveness that takes weight off my body but this did. You see Satan comes to steel, kill, and destroy. He had stolen the joy of my relationships with family and some friends. He had killed my internal gage as to what was an appropriate way to deal with it all. And he had destroyed parts of who I am and my ability to have a right relationship with God the father. I left that day knowing that I was completely forgiven, everything was totally severed that could effect my life concerning that act. There was nothing anyone could bring against me, there was nothing hidden that Satan could use to destroy my witness. It is amazing to me to reflect on that situation and see how when God gives us a standard it is all about us and His overwhelming love for us that requires Him to set the standard so high. And it also seems obvious to me why Satan would wage war against every person Christian or not in this way. It renders a person helpless even if they do not know it. It effects women in such a way that the emotional, soft, beautiful, confident, loving, and graceful person that we are supposed to be is rendered helpless. Making us hard, self-defending, sharp tongued, self-sufficient, emotionally scared women in need of control. After all if we do not protect ourselves who will?? I thought my life was fine. I was fully convinced that I was forgiven and free from this guy and all the crap that came along with the choices I had made. What I did not realize is that I had taken Gods job; to be the guardian of my heart. I had given the job to a man; my father but then taken the thing he was to guard; my heart and gave it to yet another man; the guy. All the people failed because I had set each of them up to fail in a profound way. I, after all, am not God. Only God can be the true guardian of my heart. He will not put a protection around my heart until I offer it up to Him. Once I do that then my father is free to do what he is supposed to and whatever guy has to approach the throne of God to ask for my heart. If God allows him to have it then I would imagine this is a man smart enough to know that he now in “possession” of the heart of a princess, HAS to hand it right back to the King and guardian for safe keeping.
Honestly, I can’t wait to meet that guy. He is going to be something, yet still flawed, just like me. I feel like I have come a long way in the past two months but I know there is still a ways to go. Praise God he only gives us what we can handle. For me it is small spoonfuls at a time. Only through his grace are things changing. Daily I can see the result of living a life without anything to hide. You see, I think I now have a small understanding of what it means to not only have Jesus as my savior but also God as my LORD. There is a big difference. One is fire insurance the other is a way of life.
By the way, my Dad and I have had some really great conversations and I have gotten through them all without shedding a single tear. That would not have happened three months ago. Truly when the son has set you free, you are free INDEED.