I think blogging is a blast. Clearly I do it all the time, eye roll. The truth is I have a lot of thoughts but I am just not sure people want to read them all the time so I keep lots of them to myself and only try to share what I feel God is revealing to me. Today I'm borrowing a subject from Peter Haas.
First off I would like to address the subject of my pastors message yesterday, Parenting. I was raised in a house where the facts shared in the message were a no-brainer but it was sure interesting to me that he used a secular study to prove what my parents have been saying all along. That the number one predictor of raising healthy stable kids is spiritual nurturing. Teaching your kids about faith. The second is how the parents handle their own stress. Interesting, how the adults handle stress and even what steps they take to avoid stress all together; i.e. making sure you are on a budget, will greatly impact the children in the house. The third, again, does not even involve the children, is how you treat your spouse. Can you believe that?? If they are in a home with a rocky marriage and the adults are at odds there is no amount of money that can change that. No gift or toy will be able to undo what has happened due to the fact that our pride is too big or that we are so selfish. The quality of your marriage effects the kids. You can't throw around the option of divorce and say that the kids will be fine, they won't according to this study.
He said that we seem to have this mentality that we ensure a good marriage in the "shopping stage" meaning we think if we find the right person to marry in the first place that the work is done. We found the right pair of shoes now go run. But it doesn't work like that. We need to be vigilant in our relationship and put lots of time into each other. His advice for couples: every 7 days go on a date, every 7 weeks go away on a weekend together, and every 7 months go on a vacation or mini-vacation together. The kids need to learn how to self sooth or cope when Mom and Dad are not around anyway so this is a good opportunity and healthy for both the children and the parents.
OH, he also said that if a couple spontaneously kiss 8 times a day they will be more healthy, physically. Cool huh?
I can't wait to try all this good stuff out on my husband, whenever God gives him to me that is.
He also did a message last week about the meaning of the word "head" as in the head of the household. Here in America the church gets it wrong often and men tend to think it means that when it comes down to it they are the boss. This is true HOWEVER, the actual meaning is the first to act. I.e. the first to go to battle, the first to sacrifice, the first to repent, the first to call together. You get the idea. The meaning seems more true to the phrase we use: the head of the river. Not the controller but the source of family. Anyway, if you want to hear more and definitely a more eloquent listen go to: http://substancechurch.com/podcast/i/1b40c
I had more to say but it seems so unimportant next to parenting issues. Please utilize the resources available. Your marriage is so precious to God and so SO important to many people. Us single people are watching and trying to learn the good and the could-have-been-handled- betters. Peter said there are more than 40,000 books on parenting on Amazon. It seems like a ocean not easily navigated but these short messages may help in key areas so I hope you have a few minutes to listen.
Happy kissing ;)
Kari
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