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| More is caught than taught |
(WARNING:This is a random compilation of thoughts)
It's an interesting thing to think about what opposite world means.
I have posted in my house this term related to thinking, reactions, comments, tone of voice, etc. It is HARD! When my 3yr old rips something out of her brothers hands I just about loose my mind because for the 50 billionth time I'm explaining how that is not kind. However, she sees my reaction and it begs the question, how is my reaction any more kind than what she just did?
The scripture I have been trying to meditate on is James 1:26: If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless. The scripture has so much to say about the power of the tongue. Yet, we spout things off on social media or to family that is so unthoughtful. I am trying to teach my kids the importance of being kind and am constantly reminded that "more is caught than taught." I feel like I have been bombarded with this idea in relation to my marriage too.
I have been rebelling against the idea that I need to be a nice, gracious, empathetic, helpful, meek, submissive(but not weak!), supportive, and encouraging, wife in order to exact change in my marriage. That by me taking the high road there would be more effort put into what would strengthen our marriage, there would be mutual effort, mutual respect, that it would build a team mentality to life and parenting, there would be more consideration of my needs. Quite frankly that it would cause my spouse to see Jesus in me and drive him to his knees in repentance spontaneously curing his insecurity, his selfishness, his anger, and his pride.
Not like I expect much of my influence. Eye roll
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| You can't teach what you refuse to model. |
I can fight it . . . which does not teach my kids the value of loving, being meek (def: having or showing a quiet and gentle nature: not wanting to fight or argue with other people), compassion, valuing people, or trusting God. More is caught than taught . . . But quite the opposite: bitterness, rage, complaining, self-pity, pride, NOT the legacy I want to leave.
I must address the whole concept of dying to myself which seems to be how I could define the process of what is happening to me right now. It hurts!!! I can't stand being humble!!!!! I want to be right all the time. I want to have things go my way. I feel like I singularly put so much work into building my house, our environment, our mentalities, etc. to be life giving and peaceful that I want everyone to follow me!!! Do what I say!!! Stop acting like my work has no value!!!
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| God protect my babies from my sin! |
Clearly I have a ways
to go to even vaguely resemble humility, grace, and compassion. God is faithful. I tell everyone, and the truth makes my will ache, that God is so faithful that he will revisit whatever lesson we need. Of coarse that means challenges in specific areas until we learn. Until it is a soul change. OUCH!!
Needless to say the process of dying hurts and takes time. I'm learning everyday through every failure that God's way, the opposite world way, is the best way whether it feels like the high road or not. It is the only way to keep my sanity and teach my kids how to be more like Christ and to BE more like Christ.
That is my goal and that is why I live.
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